Saturday, February 20, 2016

If you came here looking for porn...

Hi there!

It recently (as in about 2 hrs ago) came to my attention that due to an uncanny similarity in names, you may have come to my site looking for something other than stories about life with my daughter, Julia. 

And while I am indeed Julia's mom, I am not Julia Ann's mom (actually to be honest, I am Julia Anne's mom, but it's Anne with an E, so still different) - and so, if you came here looking for porn, you've probably already figured it out, I am not the mom you are looking for.

But hey, since you are here why don't you stay for a second - I have something I want to say to you. Yes you! Reader who came here looking for porn but is reading my words instead - I have something to tell you!

You matter.
You matter a lot.
You are incredibly valuable.
Your life has purpose and meaning even if it doesn't feel like it right now. 
You still matter.

I don't know what you are going through. I don't know what you have done or what has been done to you. I'm sorry for the pain it caused, but nothing that has happened could change the fact that you matter.

I am not judging you for choices. I get what it's like to want to distract and numb when life hurts. I do. I happen to be in the camp of people who believe that we are all doing the best we can with what we've got. So I think you are doing the best you can - even if what you are doing is looking for porn. 

But you didn't find porn this time did you? You found me instead...

You found me telling you that you matter. That you are more than your pain, you are more than your past. You are more than the people who have hurt you, you are more than the decisions you have made. 

You matter. 

And so because I believe we are all doing the best we can with what we've got, I now want you to do the best you can with what I just told you. Before you move on to find what you were looking for in the first place, will you pause a second? Will you think about what I just said? Will you consider it? Will you consider that you do matter? Will you question for one second why a search for something far more popular than this little blog led you here instead? Could it be because I'm right? Because you really do matter and you not only needed to hear it, you deserve to hear it? Could it be there is more to your story than hiding and distracting and numbing?

I think maybe a part of you knows it's true, but it's hard to feel it. It's painful to let it sink in. That is okay, it really is. Feel it as much as you can right now, and go do the best you can with what you now have. 

Because you matter, friend. 
No matter what, you matter. 
And you are welcome here anytime.

-Laurie, Julia's Mom

5 comments:

  1. I'm not sure how I feel about this post, though I do appreciate this blog. Just because someone is looking for pornography on the internet does not mean they are in pain, or have had anything "done" to them, or feel that they do not matter. Looking for porn does not imply that one is necessarily trying to "numb or distract" - maybe they're just horny...sexuality and masturbation are a normal part of life, and are perfectly healthy. Thanks for your input, but perhaps do not judge others as you have asked us not to judge you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much for taking the time to read and comment!! If it doesn't apply to you or many others then that is a very good thing! For those who are hurting and need to hear they are more than their addiction - whatever that addiction is - I hope they land on this page.

      Delete